I'm positive

I've been working diligently at phrasing my direction in a positive manner.

This is much harder than one might think. What we notice first, almost always, is what is not working. The tremendous temptation is to say: "Don't ______"


Don't push.

Don't drop the end of the line.

Don't rush.

In directing-- in fact, in any guiding/teaching/parenting/whatever-- what NOT to do is not especially useful information. Even if the actor (student/child/whatever) wants to follow the suggestion, what they have is what to DON'T. I haven't given the actor what to DO.


While always reminding my actor that these are suggestions or guides, I try to give more positive information:

Relax. Allow yourself to search to find the right words.


Lift the end of your line.


Take your time; allow the action to unfold.


Here's a tip shared with me by another director: Use "and" instead of "but". As soon as we hear the word "but," we stop listening because we're anticipating criticism. We are fearful of being judged; we shut down. Hearing the word "and," on the other hand, we anticipate addition, building, growth.


This:


I like the way you focus on the exchange between Fred and Mary, but try to interrupt them sooner with your line.


Or this:


I like the way you focus on the exchange between Fred and Mary, and if you interrupt them sooner with your line, it will intensify that tension.


Which would you prefer to hear?